Is Your Wardrobe Reflecting Who You Are Now (And Not 3 or 5 or 10 Years Ago)?
Did you know that most department stores have styling services that are free with no obligation to buy anything? I’ve had some great experiences working with different stylists over the years. Today I had a call with a stylist from Bloomingdales about my upcoming session. Brett had the usual questions for me like my height and eye color and also a very kind way of asking me how I was feeling about body image. It was something along the lines of: “I am asking this from a place of body positivity, but after everything we have gone through in the past few years due to covid, how are you feeling about your body?” We talked about how my body has changed (bodies change, that is what they do!) and I wanted to find clothes that made me feel good now without comparing myself to when I was 25. I’ll admit, some days this is easier to feel positive about than others! But as a San Francisco based professional organizer, I really try to practice what I preach by having things that suit my life today and make me happy to look at in my immediate surroundings.
How do you feel when you look in your closet? Are your things reflecting who you are now, not who you once were or someone you hope to be one day? I have a fun and easy way to test out what you are reaching for while making space for new things to come in.
Have you ever heard of the “hanger decluttering hack”?
It’s nothing new, but I hear that it is all over Tik Tok right now and it happens to be a decluttering device that can be pretty useful, easy and requires no extra supplies.
Swing those hangers around so that they face you.
How does the hanger decluttering hack work? You simply turn all of the hangers in your closet around so that the open part of the hanger “hook” faces you. Every time you wear something, you turn the hanger back around the normal way. After a month or two you will step back and clearly see what you have and haven't been wearing. You can learn a lot from both categories.
For the things that haven't been worn, ask yourself, why? Perhaps it is as simple as a dress that needs cleaning or a shirt with a missing button. Use this information to get things cleaned and fixed or decide that they are beyond repair and let them go.
What about winter clothes, swim suits or other seasonal clothes? Seasonal items generally won’t be helpful to track with this hack in the offseason. But as a general rule, if your closet is packed tight, it might be a good sign that those heavy woolens or thick coats might be better stored in a coat closet or in airtight bins in the garage to make more space for your everyday wardrobe. Also, once you have practiced this trick for a while, it might make you look more discerningly at these clothes too and start culling the ones you don’t want.
Do I have too much business attire? Something that I am seeing right now is folks who have a lot of work attire but who are now working from home most, if not all of the time. If that is the case for you, you might consider thinning out those clothes to make space for more casual clothes. Keep a few favorites (classic styles are always best), but if they haven't been worn in three years and are looking dated, it might be time to let them go. The location in your closet where the backwards hangers remain is also helpful to track. Are you reaching way past the rarely used dressy clothes everyday to where your casual tops are? Consider moving things around to make your closet work for you and what you wear the most. Anytime you are craning, stretching or crouching for regularly used things, something needs to change!
What can I learn from the hangers that have been flipped back around? Are there clothing types, colors, fabric weights or patterns that are clear favorites? Again, ask yourself why? The Pareto Principle says that we wear 20% of our wardrobes most of the time. What are you wearing? Zeroing in on the types of clothes that you feel best in, that reflect your style and your lifestyle will help shopping for new clothes easier in the future. It can also draw the line between what you wear and what I call “aspirational clothes”. Most of us have clothes that might fit a life that doesn’t quite jive with ours. Maybe they are for someone 10 pounds lighter, someone who never spills (or has kids who never spill) or someone who goes out dancing every night. Maybe they belong to your dream persona who wears strappy silk sundresses and floppy hats but you live in San Francisco and it’s rarely above 60 degrees (is that just me?). It’s okay to have dreams in whatever form you want to have them. But repeat after me: your closet is valuable real estate. Keeping a few aspirational things can be fine, but it is good self care to have your closet be a reflection of who you are now.
What about formal wear? I would give them a year of hanger hack observations, particularly as we are still coming back from covid related social upheaval. It’s helpful to have go-tos for a wedding/funeral or special night out. But if these aren't regular occurrences in your world, think carefully about what stays. Fancy clothes can be bulky and fussy to deal with in a closet. If you have been mentally blocked just thinking about dry cleaning or tailoring a dress that has been in a garment bag for years, consider letting it go.
I recently did this myself. I had several dressy dresses that I hadn't worn in years. I culled them down to two that have pretty classic silhouettes, are easy to style and that I knew I would have footwear and accessories on hand. It can be a bitter pill to swallow, thinking about letting things we spend good money on go, but I promise you, you will feel lighter by trying this out.
I feel guilty about not wearing things that I buy enough (or at all)! Yeah, I get it. It is very human to feel that way. Many of us have purchased things that we don’t wear, either because our lifestyle, our health, our body size and/or our circumstances change (or we just gave something new a try that didn’t work out!) I think it is so important to accept ourselves wherever we are. Some might say that it is superficial to think that our closets have much to do with self acceptance, but I think they are a great way to get to practice it everyday! Marie Kondo would tell you to thank those clothes for whatever they meant to you at the time and say good-bye. If you just rolled your eyes at that, I get you! But maybe there is a less corny way to see that it’s okay to let go and save our attention for things that work for us and make us feel good. The pang of guilt or sadness that can come up, even unconsciously, every time your eyes pass those things in your closet can be draining. Consider moving them out and see if you notice a change in how you feel.
No one likes to be wasteful. I think this might be especially true in the Bay Area - my big hearted clients sincerely want their cared for things to be used. Some find that they feel better about letting go when they know that their things can be sold or donated to serve someone. else. Clothes are meant to be worn and enjoyed!
Here are a few places where you can donate your clothes to help others:
Dress for Success (SF and Nationally) Donate your gently used professional attire to help empower women in our community.
St. Anthony’s Free Clothing Program (SF) Takes contributions of mens, womens, maternity & childrens clothes, including casual, seasonal and business attire in good condition.
Soles 4 Souls (National with drop boxes at DSWs in the SF Bay Area) Donate used shoes of all types and sizes.
Goodwill, Out of the Closet & this article gives a list of other local and national charities.
